The neighbor’s dog just fell into my bush.
The neighbor above me has a two pound chihuahua. It got an attitude and went to attack the dog that was on the balcony across the way. It charged through the railings and fucking fell into the bush below my window. All I heard was a scream, a crash, and yapping.
This is why I don’t have children, dogs, or boyfriends under 30. They have no comprehension of their own mortality or the laws of physics.